I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
