I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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