She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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