I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
