I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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