youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
