I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize