i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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