i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
