Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
