I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
