During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize