based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
