so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize