I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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