I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
