Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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