you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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