you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
