I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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