Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

worst lay ever....

(780): View more from Alberta, CA

as long as you cum, there is no bad sex

(403): View more from Alberta, CA

ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement

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(403): worst lay ever.... (780): as long as you cum, there is no bad sex (403): ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement http://tfl.nu/cjn6

Replies (32) Good night (554) Bad night (6621)
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(910): View more from North Carolina

I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.

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(910): I just made Jack Daniels snow cones. http://tfl.nu/ca8x

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(513): View more from Ohio

he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden

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(513): he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden http://tfl.nu/xsqd

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(330): View more from Ohio

Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.

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(330): Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high. http://tfl.nu/m92h

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(949): View more from California

this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.

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(949): this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning. http://tfl.nu/8me0

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.

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(910): Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse. http://tfl.nu/i97p

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(360): View more from Washington

I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.

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(360): I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now. http://tfl.nu/b1mw

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(509): View more from Washington

i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron

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(509): i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron http://tfl.nu/ihph

Replies (14) Good night (1541) Bad night (778)
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(216): View more from Ohio

Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.

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(216): Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway. http://tfl.nu/lxny

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(928): View more from Arizona

You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?

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(928): You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect? http://tfl.nu/nafu

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(416): View more from Toronto

BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.

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(416): BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me. http://tfl.nu/xkbl

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(661): View more from California

Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.

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(661): Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre. http://tfl.nu/eizk

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.

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(+44): When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies. http://tfl.nu/0fef

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.

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(+44): She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn. http://tfl.nu/qwtm

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(404): View more from Georgia

Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.

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(404): Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat. http://tfl.nu/fqqq

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