as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
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I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
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Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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