On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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