I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
