it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
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Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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