I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
