So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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