I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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