its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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