Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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