I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
