i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
