belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
