in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
