Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.