Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize