This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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