he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
