Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
