Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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