apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize