Do you still have your period?
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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