so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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