ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
The uberlube is also flammable
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
