I'm drive I can fine osifer
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
