If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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