Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize