Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize