I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
