Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Randomize