you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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